I BROUGHT YOU FLOWERS TODAY

I admit, today was a struggle.  I had no idea just how very difficult it would be.  I had it all planned out.  I would go to work, get through the day and then go spend some quiet time at the cemetery.  Because, how could I let this day pass without acknowledging it in some way?  Without this day, I wouldn't have my three boys.  I have no idea who I would have become without you in my life.  You, who taught me to be independent, to follow my dreams.  You, who always brought me flowers, even when we couldn't afford it.  You who treated me like a queen and showed our boys the importance of respecting, valuing, loving and cherishing a wife, a soulmate.

But you know what, this quiet day I had planned didn't quite end up the way I had planned.  Your boys, our sons, had other plans.  A box of chocolate covered strawberries delivered to the office was the beginning of my undoing.  With love, from my boys.  I am sure I probably frightened everyone in the office to death because once the tears started, they seemed to leak out all day.  My cup was truly running over and leaking out my eyes.  Then a phone call from the courthouse checkpoint.  "Ms. York?  You have a delivery out here."  Ok.  And there was the most beautiful vase of flowers I could ever imagine.  This time, the note read:

                         

                      "We know that today is difficult for you but we are so thankful for the 37

                     years of marriage that the Lord blessed you with as an example to us and 

                        so many others.  We love you!  Your Boys"

They were watching all those years.   They were learning, and they are respecting, valuing, loving and cherishing me in your place.  Thank you for passing that on to them.

So, I brought you flowers today to acknowledge the importance of the last 37 years of my life, of our lives together.  I know you won't know it, you won't see them, but whoever passes by will know that someone cared enough to bring you flowers.  Today has been by far the most difficult day of the past seven months.  This was "our" day.  As I sat in the cold wind reflecting on our life together I couldn't help but realize even on the darkest, hardest of days, there is hope for a bright tomorrow.  There is hope for healing and restoration.  Isaiah 35 is a chapter about the hope for restoration for the people of Israel who felt they had no hope, and these verses have given me hope for the ongoing restoration in my life.

             1. Even the wilderness and desert will be glad in those days.  The wasteland will rejoice and blossom with spring crocuses.

             2. Yes, there will be an abundance of flowers and singing and joy!  The deserts will become as green as the mountains of Lebanon, as lovely as Mount Carmel or the plain of Sharon.  There the Lord will display His glory, the splendor of our God.

            3. With this news, strengthen those who have tired hands, and encourage those who have weak knees.

             4. Say to those with fearful hearts, 'Be strong, and do not fear, for your God is coming to destroy your enemies.  He is coming to save you.'

              5. And when He comes, He will open the eyes of the blind and unplug the ears of the deaf.

              6. The lame will leap like deer, and those who cannot speak will sing for joy!  Springs will gush forth in the wilderness, and streams will water the wasteland.

              7. The parched ground will become a pool, and springs of water will satisfy the thirsty land. Marsh grass and reeds and rushes will flourish where desert jackals once lived.

              8. And a great road will go through that once deserted land.  It will be named the Highway of Holiness.  Evil-minded people will never travel on it.  It will be only for those who walk in God's ways; fools will never walk there.

             9.  Lions will not lurk along its course, nor any other ferocious beasts.  There will be no other dangers.  Only the redeemed will walk on it.

            10. Those who have been ransomed by the Lord will return.  They will enter Jerusalem singing, crowned with everlasting joy.  Sorrow and mourning will disappear, and they will be filled with joy and gladness.   Isaiah 35, NLT

So, I brought you flowers today to acknowledge not only our life together, but that I know sorrow and mourning will disappear and I can and will be filled with joy and gladness.  I know this because 

     "Doesn't matter what I feel, doesn't matter what I see.  My hope will always be in

      Your promises to me.  Now I'm casting out all fear, for Your love has set me free.

  My hope will always be in Your promises to me."  Promises - Elevation Worship

And God never breaks a promise.